Stop and Take a Breath

I drive by this park on my way to work every day and often I want to stop and just take a few minutes to enjoy it. So on this day, I stopped. I took some pictures as the sun came up and I took as many deep breaths as I could. I applied a filter to the picture to make it look like a painting and to express the surrealism of that moment.

It was empowering to stop and take a breath even if it meant being a few minutes late to work. For a moment I exited the rat race and went away from the usual routine and it felt amazing. I posted the pictures on Instagram and other people liked them too. I felt like I made a  little ripple in my world pond for that moment and for that day.

Now, when I look at the photo I can remember that it’s okay to step away from the world and take a breath, in fact it’s crucial that I do it more often.

Small shifts in our thinking and in our routines can have huge impacts on the rest of our lives. Many people have suggested this practice of doing one thing different to expand your consciousness, just one thing.

How Do You Take Your Coffee?

I take my coffee with butter, cinnamon, stevia, and MCT oil. Thanks to Dave Asprey who originally popularized “Bulletproof Coffee” through podcasters that I listen to like Joe Rogan and Tim Ferriss I learned about this amazing jump start to the day that is as simple or complex as you want it to be for you. You can obsess over the ingredients and make it as pure and robust as hell, or you can modify to your budget and it still works.

I buy affordable coffee middle of the road, not the cheapest but not expensive. I buy grass fed butter from Aldi or Trader Joes, I ordered a big bottle of MCT oil online that last for a really long time using about a tablespoon a day. I buy cinnamon from Trader Joes for 99¢ and the stevia varies from organic from Kroger to cheap stuff at Aldi depending on my budget and time. But nonetheless, I put all this together in my Nutribullet and blend every morning pretty much without fail and I drink it while writing to start the day.

The idea of adding this pure fat to coffee or tea which is delicious too, dates back to ancient monks living in caves in the Himalayas I have heard. They used yak butter and tea and I think still do in some parts of the world. Anyways, with this energy source they could survive with no food for days. There is some science behind the MCT oil being so pure that the energy is ready for your brain very quickly without having to be processed through the body (yeah, I barely understand) but what I do understand is how great it makes me feel and how clear my brain feels at 5:30 in the morning as soon as I am enjoying it. I give the most credit to habits that work for me and ones that I have stuck with over a long period of time. Sometimes it’s a pain in the ass to make it every morning and always have the best ingredients, but it pays off and it works!

Tait Fletcher is doing it right! Click here for really, really good coffee 🙂

Writing Past the Point

“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.”

-Tony Robbins

My garden, Spring 2015

Writing Past the Point is a concept that was introduced to me in counseling. As someone who journals every day this seemed like a great experiment. The idea is just like it sounds, you run through the normal recap of what you’ve done and how you basically are feeling and then once you’ve exhausted all that you have to say, you keep writing and that is when the breakthroughs happen. You take off the superficial layers of the day and really dig deeper to understand what happened inside you when you lost your temper, ate the whole cake, drank the whole bottle, yelled at your kid, acted out in some way other than what you really meant.

Why? It’s the getting to the why that is helping me navigate back to the path and understand my trigger points and how I cope or don’t cope effectively. And from this point I can plan around the trigger points with different interventions, like taking a bath, listening to a meditation, going for a long walk, listening to music, or whatever it is that helps me feel calm again. So far, for me this is working.

When I write in this stream of consciousness style without stopping I am able to stumble upon some epiphanies of sorts and realize what is at the root of my behavior with the hope of uprooting that behavior when I expose its source to fresh air and light. Yes, it’s like killing a weed, sort of. For me it’s like a dandelion because they are never really gone and once you set your mind to ridding your lawn of them, you really discover just how many there are and you see very clearly that this is going to take some work.

Not the Same River, Not the Same Woman

“No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.”

-Heraclitus

Setting goals that you’ve already set before can feel self-defeating. It’s like that feeling of a broken record playing in your mind. You tell yourself similar things while your cynical side fueled by fear just sort of folds her arms and humors your attempt to try again.

But this time will be different. This time is for real. This time I am serious, and so on. So the game keeps being played in our heads and we let the fear and the self-doubt win because that is the easier thing to do. But the important thing, the big thing, the enormous thing is that it’s not the same and you’re not the same this time. It feels similar, but it can’t be the same, because so much has happened since the last time that has changed you, for better or worse.

It doesn’t matter what the goal is whether it’s to give up a bad habit, lose weight, get a better job, save more money, be a better parent or whatever it may be right now. The dragon is just a myth and when you get to the battle this time will be different because you’ve learned its tricks, you know its weaknesses and yours. You now carry a sword and armor and the courage to tame the beast and send it on its way.

I wonder why I fear change and why trying again feels so hard. Then, I remember the ultimate truth for me and that is that not trying is the worst possible choice. I won’t give up even if I feel like Sisyphus, condemned to roll the boulder up the hill only to watch it roll back down again. I am going to get that boulder over the top this time and see what is on the other side.

I am not the same woman who stepped into this river and I intend to prove that this time because this time is different.

Better, not perfect

I have been thinking a lot about my New Year’s resolutions and reflecting on the years past like we all do this time of year. My goal this year is to do better overall. I am not going to overhaul my whole life and go crazy with trying to obtain perfection or absolute anything. I’m not going to give anything up or do everything all the way. I think we beat ourselves up trying to go green, be Paleo, join the cross fitters club, give up meat, quit sugar and so on until we forget what it is that we are “allowed”  to do.

So, here’s my take. Just do better. Every time I do better, I feel better. Yesterday I brought in my reusable grocery bags at the store and I felt better not using the plastic. I’m not going to say from now on this is all I do and when I don’t I shall mentally beat myself for forgetting. I walked around the block a few times after dinner the other night and I felt better. I drank less than I wanted to so that today I could feel better. I took my make-up off before bed and my skin looks better today. I cleaned my room and put away my laundry so that my room looks better.

When I hit the drive thru for fast food, I didn’t order fries with that and that’s better. Sure I know best would be not to drive thru, but it was better. I stretched and did 5 minutes of yoga, an hour a day would be best, but I did better. I put my phone away for an hour. I also set it on Do Not Disturb, from 10 pm to 6 am, I still check it sometimes but it’s better.

I spent time editing a few pictures and finding the perfect quote to place on them. I don’t know what I am going to do with them, but it’s art and I feel better after doing it. I started this blog and that’s better too.